Growing up I always admired tomboys, to be more exact, tough girls. Mostly because they were as rough as my male counterparts and didn’t mind playing in the dirt, a game of football in the street, or guns around the neighborhood. There was always something cool about that type of girl, even characters from TV shows and movies like Jody Foster in the Bad News Bears. I liked that she was uncompromising.
When I got into punk, I loved the way Exene from X and Poly Styrene from X-Ray Spex had character, a sense of self and individualism. They spat in the face of gender roles, challenged the notion of beauty and more importantly didn’t need society’s approval on how they expressed themselves. Their aesthetic was a far cry from the Farrah Fawcett gold standard look of what teenaged boy fantasied about and teenaged girls imitated. The fact that people could just be themselves and bypass all the bullshit commercialism and social constructions shoved in our faces, was what made punk ideal.
When I started attending punk shows, I took note that women in the scene initiated ideas and had active roles, from playing in bands, to making fanzines, to promoting. Witnessing equal contributions by everyone involved quashed any gender stereotyping I might have otherwise developed.
Jill at the Taste of Denver. Original photograph: Cathie Burns (R.I.P): Ink drawing by Bob Rob (Medina).
At the time, Jill took risks in finding places for bands to play (in-part thanks to Headbanger), getting a P.A. system, making and posting fliers, contacting bands and other thankless tasks. Jill not only faced adversity from the city, police, and other forms of authority, but also from those within the punk community. She did a lot for our scene so we were all able see bands, hang out with friends, and bring like-minded people together in the void that Denver often was. In fact most promoters unselfishly gave themselves for the greater good. It seems more than appropriate that Jill occupies a space in my forthcoming book: Denvoid and the Cowtown Punks.
Jill took the time to reflect and respond on questions I sent her during the past couple of months. This is herstory.
How did you get into punk, your first punk show?
A friend of mine in Berthoud turned me on to punk back in late ’77. My first show was the Ramones in ‘78 at the Rainbow Music Hall.
I lived in Ft. Collins and there weren't any shows up there, so I started putting on shows at The Bellevue Grange outside the city in the little town of La Porte. All of the bands were from Denver. I only did a few shows there. Headbanger was a big influence on me. He gave me all kinds of information. I give him credit for becoming a promoter.
Your first show, how did it go? Was there a learning curve?
That first show at the Grange was back in 1983. Most of the audience was from Denver and a few folks from Ft. Collins. It was a packed house. I learned that using a band’s practice P.A. isn’t loud enough for a large hall. Charging $2.50 at the door is not so clever. Always have a bill amount. NEVER USE CENTS. My god, what a pain dealing with all the coins. It’s bad enough having kids panhandling out front to get into show and pay with pennies. Seriously, I've had a few kids pay with only pennies.
Razer's first show at the Bellevue Grange in LaPorte. Courtesy of Jill Razer
When I think about it, I was treated a bit differently. At first they thought I was doing this to be the ultimate groupie. After they talked with me, I commanded respect. In a sense I was never treated as a female; I was always one of the guys. This also backfired in many ways, mainly because I never had a boyfriend in all of those years.
What were some of the bigger obstacles you faced putting on shows?
Paying bands a guarantee, finding a venue, trying to do everything on a low budget. I worked as an offset printer so fliers were free.
There’s not much glory in being a promoter. There’s a lot of shit that you have to deal with. What kept you going?
Hell if I know. I became friends with many bands. That made me feel I was doing something important.
Best venue to book a show?
I liked doing shows where there was already a P.A. and all you had to do was fill in the slot. I think the Funhouse was my favorite place. Brian and I were the only ones booking so we did what we wanted.
At the Sonic Youth show at the German House, I remember you jumped on Big John to get him to stop dancing. Were there other times you had to get physical with people?
I didn’t have to get physical with anyone. But then I liked to push my weight around. I was a total control freak. The deal with Big John was that the German House didn’t want a pit, but Big John decided to start dancing/slamming in an obnoxious way. I took it upon myself to take him down and kick him out of show. In retrospect, I could have handled it differently. It did put a riff on our friendship.
Violence in the punk scene started to become a nationwide problem. What do you think was that root of that? Is punk inherently violent?
Rebellious kids hanging out with other rebellious kids listening to rebellious music. Hormones raging. In the beginning there wasn’t any violence, but the kids started to faction off into their own cliques. See, in the beginning we were the outcasts so we stuck together. The music wasn’t fractioned off into subcategories. The scene grew and people formed their own groups of friends. The difference in music tastes also contributed: there was: Oi, Hardcore, New Wave, Goth, Industrial. Each subcategory of punk attracted a different group of people and when you mix them together sometimes it explodes.
The Denver Skins; did they impact any of your shows?
There was a group of kids that like to antagonize the punks and the punks wouldn’t stand up to the skins so of course the skins had fun just fucking with them. You know that jock mentality. It just escalated. Their numbers swelled. Not many people would stand up to them. I was one of the few who did. So, yes, there was an impact. If the skins were at a show there would always be an altercation. It was just a fact. The only time the skins wouldn't show up was if it wasn’t a hardcore punk show.
Harassment from the police?
Nope, I was really lucky plus I was always nice and respectful to the police (laughter). Not very punk rock of me. The cops never personally harassed me. I know Headbanger got harassed. There was a time the cops were on a witch-hunt for skins. They stopped punks and asked them questions, looked at their tattoos, took pictures, etc., but we didn't know who or what they were looking. As for cops showing up to shows, I learned a great Headbanger trick to hire off duty officers to be security. They would just wave at the other cops and there wasn't a problem.
What about the Dr. Know show at the Funhouse?
As for that show, it was before I learned the off-duty officer trick. Another trick was to have a sign saying donations. The Funhouse was an illegal venue. The cops did come and bust that show. It was my biggest encounter with the police at any of my shows. They closed it down by force. I remember Dr. Know was on stage and they were trying to get them to stop and the drummer kept playing and throwing drumsticks at the cops. At that time I grabbed the door money and hid upstairs in a cabinet. I put a note on the band’s van that I would meet them at my apartment so I could pay them. Well, they never saw the note, so the roadie took a bass amp with them for their services. We did meet up later that night to pay them and got the amp back. Mark (R.I.P.), a cook at Fatz City, came to my rescue that evening and got the shit beat out of him by the cops and was hospitalized.
What club/venue do you feel sentimental about?
Kennedys. There were many great shows there, but froze my ass off. The Funhouse for the same reason, but also froze my ass off there as well. The Packing House: it was well hidden and there were great parking lot parties, though it stunk on days when they burned the blood, bones, etc. I guess it comes down to warehouses . They made a big impression on me. I love architecture.
At what point did you say, “fuck it” and tap out?
After the Corrosion of Conformity (COC)/BL’AST! show. That was the last straw.
What exactly went down at that show?
Oh, that was a cluster fuck from the beginning. I got a call from COC they wanted to play Denver. I got them at a $1000 guarantee. BL’AST was on tour also, so I put them on the bill and they wanted a $700 guarantee. Burnt Fase opened. David Lee, bassist of Burnt Fase, was my partner and had money for the deposit. A few days before the show, COC called and wanted $1500. I couldn't make the numbers work so we cancelled. But as in true form I pulled a Headbanger and waited until the show to let everyone know. The reason was because BL’AST could NOT fill the Aztlan Theatre. It was either cancel and lose the deposit or change venues. So I added a local band, lowered door price, and said the COC van broke down. David Lee said he’d handle the security; it was mostly his buddies. The show went on no problem other than a few complaints. The next thing I remember a fight broke out with the skins, and my friend Danica and I got maced. Damn that burned and pissed me OFF! Seats were being torn out and fists were flying. David's security couldn't handle the crowd and the venue brought in their own security to stop fights. The skins gathered outside and decided to try to tip the BL’AST’s van over but only broke the windshield. Two of Denver’s bigger promoters came up to me after the show and told me point blank, “It's promoters like you that give us a bad name.” I never wanted to be a big time promoter like those guys, I liked the grass root DIY underground approach to shows: the only way to know about a show is by word of mouth or if you were lucky enough to find one of the 500 fliers printed. So I had $500 in damages to the hall, the van and sound equipment. Out of pocket if I remember correctly, around $1000. How and why did this happened? COC had on the back of their album Animosity stating: "The only good thing about a skinhead is that they are biodegradable.” 30 years later I’ve had conversations with all parties involved and there are no hard feelings.
What was Nuter’em?
(Laughter) It was a joke band that never became a band. It was just something I would talk about all of the time, but it never came to be. It was supposed to be an all red head/ woman band, basically like a female Spinal Tap. It’s a comment on the music industry. I had these ideas of grandeur of how we would have all sorts of fake press on what manizers (think opposite of womanizer) we were and all of our shenanigans, artwork for ten albums that we released. In reality we had only five songs written and they were covers with new lyrics. Today, it could be a really funny play or a movie. I have a ton of stickers of the band’s logo. I even had the logo tattooed on my arm back then. My friend Marc just had the logo tattooed on her calf 30 years later. Too damn funny.
You packed-up and moved to Germany. Was that part of a healing/distancing factor for you?
I had been trying to get rid of the Razer persona for a few years. I wanted to soften up. That really didn’t happen until I moved to Berlin. I was virtually unknown in Berlin, with the exception of the people/bands I went on tour with who lived there. I did a lot of growing and self-discovery there. I learned that I had a talent for teaching children and that I can work in a collective.
You moved from being a promoter to more or less a de facto gatekeeper of a certain time period of the Denver punk scene. Was it something you wanted to do or did it fall into your lap?
It was typical of me wanting to be in control. Plus, I’m a big softy and I wanted a way to stay connected with everyone from the past. It really was a great time in my life. Plus, I have a knack for keeping in touch with people and archiving. It just seemed natural to make the Denver Punk Scene Facebook page. I’m glad I did. I think many great things have come from it such as people getting back in touch with each other, amends being made, memories being shared, and us sharing what we accomplished.
You have love/hate relationship with the scene. Why do you think that is?
You’re right. I do. I guess I’m jaded. I saw so many fantastic bands back in the day but I don’t see a point in seeing them again because it will destroy those memories. I’ve tried to raise money to make a website dedicated to the Denver scene and I felt I was shat upon and didn’t get enough support. I still have the little bit of money waiting for that day where I will make a website dedicated to the scene and Phil The Fan. I don’t see the point of putting my blood sweat and tears into a project that no one gives a god damn about. l have many photos that haven’t seen the light of day. I figure the page on Facebook will have to do until I get more people who will actually help me build this damn thing.
Special thanks to Monica Zarazua and Ana Medina for editing help.